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responsibility

3 Secrets to Maximizing Opportunities & Stepping Out of Our Own Way

“Laughing Hearts,” Audrye OmArt: Art That Opens the Heart, reminds us that we are laughing hearts on this Earth.

Moms and everyone, how many times have you/I/we said we want something, made the preparations, gotten ourselves there, done the internal and external work, then, when we’re there, what do we do?  Do we maximize every opportunity?  Do we allow ourselves to receive our good?  Do we sabotage ourselves?  Do we do less or allow less than whatever is possible?

To my absolute “horror,” despite how much work I have done and do on myself, still there can be occasions when I omit doing the obvious that could make such a difference for both other people and myself.  At this point, however, I take stock, do an internal interview, to seek the cause of this behavior.  There was a time I would pummel myself.

What about you?  Do you check yourself out when you realixe that you either made a mistake, omitted doing something that needed doing, did something haphazardly that required more attention, or in any other way behaved in any manner that had you feeling that you had been less than you are?

Pretty much most of us have.

Here are THREE SUPER SECRET TIPS to Maximize Opportunities and Step Out of Our Own Way, and Bring In Our Good!

1. LOVE YOURSELF.  Yes, even in the face of something you could have done better.  Even if you are feeling embarrassed.  Even if….    Stop blaming yourself!  Learn what sabotaging internal dialog (ID – remember? The Internal Tyrant!) had been chattering along either boisterously or whisperingly.    Hear this “junque” so we can behave better than any sabotaging behavior the ID may be pushing.  Are you noticing any old family patterns, or genetic karmic patterning?  Perhaps regarding relationships, arguing, money, forgetfulness, overtalking, invalidating, addictions?  Congratulate yourself; you have discovered treasure.  Now to enhance yourself and everyone else with it.

2.  TAKE CORRECTIVE ACTION.  This can be seeing the old pattern, shifting it, and forgiving yourself/ourselves.  Make that phone call.  Tell the truth in an honoring way to yourself and everyone else.  Take an action that will get you beneficial results.  Just about everything can be transformed.  It starts within.  Corrective action is, first and foremost, working on yourself.  I am doing second chakra work on myself to shift some ancient patterns that I came in with and that were inadvertently enhanced by my background.  Refuse to blame anyone else for your own stuff.  Be responsible, loving yourself all the while, clean/clear yourself, and take appropriate loving, effective, efficient action.

3.  SAY THANK YOU! Be grateful for this soul initiation.  You are growing! This is great!  Refrain from allowing a glitch on the journey to get or keep you down.  You are a Being of Light!  You are a Soul!  You are made of Creator Stuff!  Say thank you to yourself, others, God/dess for your new awareness and actions.  Pause, if need be.  Regroup.  Realign internally, and take gentle, powerful, authentic steps in both the inner and outer world.  We are all learning.  Yes, absolutely, pulsate with gratitude.

Moms, everyone, we are going to sometimes find ourselves in a thicket, sometimes of our own making, sometimes as part of a larger situation.  Learn!!!! Honor and love yourself and others!  Be truthful, with integrity and impeccability.  Take appropriate action!  Be grateful for this opportunity to evolve.  Enlightened beings know that in the third dimension, we are on a journey.

Many blessings to you, and may your journey be fabulous!!!

For excellent support, to release “junque,” and to be personally free, check out eventbrite.com/ReleaseFamilyKarma.com

Love,

Mama Heart                                                                                                                                         GoddessHeart

Audrye

TheMothersManual.com    1.888.757.3223    1.888.75PEACE   Audrye@TheMothersManual.com

Balanced Discipline 2 – 8 Tips from THE MOTHER’S MANUAL

    Everyone has her/his culture, upbringing, “genetic karmic” conditioning.  Some of these ideas may be fabulous, while others are repressive, confining, stultifying.

Because Source/the Presence was with me as I/we brought forth THE MOTHER’S MANUAL, A SPIRITUAL AND PRACTICAL GUIDE TO CHILD REARING AND MOTHERHOOD, (www.TheMothersManual.com ), I’m quoting directly from the book on Discipline.

    “Avoid hitting your child. Hitting and loving are different. The

phrase ‘this hurts me more than it hurts you’ from a parent’s mouth

when the parent is administering a spanking, beating or whooping

rings false to every child who has ever heard it. Hitting teaches that

might makes right. Smacking teaches bullying. Saying ‘because I

say so, that’s why,/ though a common-enough phrase that can slip

past many mothers’ mouths, is also an ineffective tool for teaching

and discipline. If you yourself do not know why you are saying it

or having your child do it, learn, so you can explain it to your child

in a sensible understandable manner. Children are actually smart

and often understand way more than adults give the child credit for.

 

“Reserve commands for emergencies.

 

“When you develop trust with your child, this little person, especially

when young, often desires to do what you say. Children like

to please. They like to fit into a loving situation. This adaptability

is built into them, as surely as the innate ability to crawl, walk and

evolve. Definitely, there are times when your child must do as you say

in that exact moment without the child understanding why. It may

be a matter of saving her life. You can use special language that you

set up in advance with your child so she knows when and if these

times occur. Be sure to respect this and use it sparingly and judiciously.

 

“These are the times when commands can be used wisely.

 

“If you were brought up with corporeal punishment, being hit,

and you think hitting is the only way or the most effective way to

discipline or teach respect to your child, please think again. Smacking,

hitting and/or beating are a very limited repertoire of choices,

often rendering the mother ineffective in instilling positive methods

of discipline in her child. Citing alleged Biblical ‘spare the rod and

spoil the child’ is a way to justify and rationalize violence to one’s

child.

 

“Look into alternatives.

 

“1. Learn when you are reaching your

limit of patience.

 

“2.  Have several people as alternate child caregivers

for just such times.

 

“3.  Have quiet activities your child can enjoy

and benefit from.

 

“4.  Find classes for wee ones, so you have pauses in

mothering.

 

“5.  Take classes yourself in positive methods of peaceful

discipline.

 

“6. Develop patience, ingenuity, clarity, coping skills, creativity

within yourself.

 

” 7. Meditate.

 

” 8.  Develop your own internal discipline

with love, and your child will also energetically emulate you.”

 

There is also the Reward method.  Set up a chart with chores and the like, and when the child performs them, give the child a star.  When the child refuses to do his agreed-upon responsibilities, the child can get a different mark.  Privileges can be awarded or taken away based on this chart.

 

Never ever humiliate your child, whether alone or in the midst of people.  Always respect yourself and your child as Beings of Light.  Take your child away from a group, and speak to her about inappropriate behavior.  When tihis manner of dealing with your child is extablished early on, your child will come to expect it.  This doesn’t mean she will like it, just that she will refrain from balking.  The alternative would be to have that private conversation in the midst of people, which would be contrary to his liking.

Work out signals, raising eyebrows, a “look,” a hand movement so your child knows when she is moving into the inappropriate zone.  As mom, catch stuff in the early stages, rather than waiting for a blow-up.  The brain gets into a loop, so by the time behavior gets into the hysterical screaming fit phase, often the child is unable to stop, nor, sometimes, can the adult.

Give childrfen alternate modes of behavior.  Teach them how  to recognize when they, themselves, are feeling upset, worried, angry, sad, resentful, and the like, so the child can self-correct rather than go into blow-up mode without understanding what’s going on inside them.  If you, Mom, are out of touch with your own feelings, this is the perfect time for you to learn.

We are at a nexus in human consciousness upliftment.  Despite some of the absolute insanity we see occuring in our lives, our families, politics, the world, we are more enlightened than that.  We are the arbiters of our lives, with our connection to Source/the Presence within ourselves and everywhere.  Take this opportunity to evolve yourself.  It’s the greatest game in town.

What are you ideas?  Techniques?  How do you create peaceful conflict resolution in yourself?  Your family?  The world?

 

Be blessed!!!!

 

Love,

MamaHeart

Audrye

www.TheMothersManual.com

www.ReleaseFamilyKarma.Eventbrite.com

1.888.757.3223 or 1.888.75 PEACE

Healing 3 Types of “Monster” Moms or “Poisonous” Parents

What can a mom or dad do to earn being called a “monster” or “poisonous”?

 

Let’s look at Seven Types of “Monster” Moms or “Poisonous” Parents

 

1.  The Bully Mom or Dad

This is the parent, who, even with the best of intentions, forces her or his child to do what s/he wants exactly in that moment.  “Eat your food now!!!! Everyone is waiting for you to finish!!! You are holding up everyone being ready to leave for the movies!!!”  Any of this said with a threatening tone to a child in a high chair or to a toddler, even if Mom or Dad is on her or his seeming last nerve, can absolutely be termed a bully parent.

 

Will the child comply?

 

At some point, yes, so the parent can justify her or his behavior, with the proverbial, “See?  It worked!  Now my daughter (or son) is behaving nicely.  I was right to do what I did.”

 

A better approach is to find out why the child is resisting or refusing to do what is requested.  Also, for Mom or Dad to examine their request, determining if the request is required to be completed at that very second, if there’s another way to speak to the child, if there’s something going on within the child that needs to be addressed.  None of us operate solely on the surface.  Babies, toddlers, children operate on many levels, including when they are preverbal.

 

2.   The “Ridiculing” Mom or Dad

 

“You are being ridiculous wearing that outfit.  You look like an idiot!” says a seemingly well-meaning parent, in her or his zeal to have their offspring look good, in their eyes, and what the parent takes to the eyes of their friends, workers, neighbors, society.

 

“Everyone is able to run at this age.  Why are you so slow?  Are you just stupid?” jeers another parent to her/his child, in the parent’s effort to get his/her child up to speed, in the parent’s world overview.

This type of behavior absolutely undermines the child’s sense of self, as well as invalidates the child’s progress.  Yes, we can all feel impatient with ourselves, our children, society, anything.  This is less than no justification to mock or ridicule a child.  This can also be seen as an aspect of the bullying parent.

 

If you find yourself doing any of this — and the best of parent can slip sometimes — immediately rectify it.  Apologize to your child for your words, attitude and behavior.  Let your child know you love him/her, and that you, too, are constantly learning.  Then find a more enlightened way to express what needs to be done.  If you need help, read www.TheMothersManual.com or attend the Enlightened Mom Teleseminar series and Enlightened Mom Coaching Program.

3.  The “Impossible-to-Please” Mom or Dad

I will take this right out of my own life.  When I was a child, I earned report-card grades in the 90s in all my subjects.  My mom would see this, and, though she said, “Good work,” she then added, “Why don’t you get higher?  Is this the best you can do?”  This was said in less than an approving, loving voice.

 

This may have stimulated another kind of child, encouraging her or him to work harder.  For me, however, I felt that my mom would never be satisfied with what I did.   I needed some acknowledgment and validation.  What happened was that as I got older, I felt my mom had no concept of what I did, what it tood for me to do any of what I did, and that she had no sense of how to actually encourage.

 

Of course, this stemmed from her upbringing where she was belittled and made to feel less-than from her mom.  She never “worked on” this, and continued this behavior with her children, thinking that she was doing a great job.

 

So you know, before my mom left the Earth, she and I had more than made up, forgiven ourselves and one another for our sometimes clashing behavior.  I love her and treasure her.  That little Scorpio Dragon was a great “adversary” who taught me how to deal with challenging people.

 

Any of us can fall into these three categories.  Any of us can still be feeling the effects of these and other categories of “Monster” Mom or “Poisonous Parent.”   If you would like more tips on how to heal from what you experienced from your Mom, and to avoid perpetuating this pattern, contact me at 1 888.757.3223 or 1 888.75 PEACE.  Also, www.TheMothersManual.com.

 

To have peace on the planet, we start at home, within ourselves and our families.

 

Many Bessings & Love,

 

MamaHeart

Audrye

 

Your Child Commits a Crime – What Now?

Your Child Commits a Crime – What Now?

     How would any mom feel if her child was the bullier, the rapist, the murderer, the thief, the racist?  An important aspect of mothering is to be in touch with one’s child from early on.  Be in tune with who your child is rather than who you would like her or him to be.  Teach by living example plus be words the qualities of authenticity, love, integrity, contribution, creativity, intelligence, discernment, and more. 

     This means Mom is on a lifelong learning curve.  This benefits both her and her family.  Anyone who feels learning stops at any point is the person who has stopped at that point.  Then what happens?  That person actually can begin to de-volve.  No-thing stays the same in this third-dimension world.  Everything is in constant flux, whether seemintly gently or chaotically.  Plus, this dimension abhors a vacuum.  Sooo, if an apparent vacuum exists, it’s instantaneous, as something will rush in to fill it.  We have to be responsible — with love, balance and presence — for what rushes into our momentary vacuums.

    This massive shooting in Colorado, and the subsequent behavior of the perpetrator has to be giving his mom nightmares.  What mom would refrain from asking: What did I do that I could have done differently?  What did I manage to refrain from seeing or knowing about my child?  What is going on in my child?  Without a mom being consumed with guilt — which furthers usually nothing — she does have to be responsible for herself and her knowledge of her child.  At the same time, once a child is an adult, which astrologically occurs at a person’s first Saturn Return about the age of 28 1/2 to 20, that person has to take up the mantle of his/her own personhood.

     This shooter was 24.  Many may call this an adult, as 21 is when a person gets all their rights and responsibilities.  Come, now!  How many people are truly self-responsible by 21, never mind 18?  The 20s are a time of exploration of what being an adult entails.  Most people, unfortunately, are untaught about how to be personally responsible for their emotions, thoughts, actions, behavior.

     This is NOT a blame of the mom or dad, by the way.  This is an exploration of what a mom may go through when her child commits a horrific, especially unprovoked, crime.

    We all have to be cognizant of one another’s mental states.  We have to develop our internal senses to such a degree of sensitivity that we can more easily sense when someone is “off.”  This is quite different from someone simply being other than who we are, as we all are unique.  When someone has an off-balance internal mechanism, they emit a different kind of energy.  Even psychics can be fooled, so this is an area on which our species has to focus.

     For example, some of the politicians and social movements in this country and the world are truly repressive, yet under the guise of either or religious, stable, or the way-things-are.  No, they are truly out to hurt people.  People, again, we all have to wake up!  Also, sometimes Mom is the one who is asleep, teaching unfortunate values or devalues to her child.  Sometimes it’s the child who teaches the mother.  We all have to be aware of what’s high level and what’s low.

      Know that this is a time of transformation.  Look at the clues in your own life to see where the Universe, your own Inner Compass, is urging you to grow, go, release, let go, move on, complete, open to new, have breakthroughts.  Also, yes, sometimes breakdowns are the doorway to breakthroughs.

     Blessings to ALL in this time of Change!!!!!

    On another note, my book, THE MOTHER’S MANUAL, A SPIRITUAL AND PRACTICAL GUIDE TO CHILD REARING, is now digital on Kindle and Nook.  You can get both the entire big book or any of the 20 smaller books culled from the big mama book.

Love,

Audrye
MamaHeart

www.TheMothersManual.com
www.BlogTalkRadio.com/GoddessHeartNetwork
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http://www.amazon.com/dp/B0082CMHJ0
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