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Balanced Discipline 1 – Is There Such a Thing?

What’s the most effective and peaceful method to discipline children?  There seem to be parents who still hold with the “spoil the rod, spoil the child” philosophy, happily hitting, beating and smacking their child, justifying this behavior by quoting the Bible.  On the other opposite end, there are parents who refrain from having any level of accountability or responsibility requirement for their children, nor do some of these parents hold their children to any decent standards of behavior.

Both of these polarities can have dire consequences for both the children and parents, as well as the world.  We all have to be accountable for our thoughts, language, behavior, and the consequences of our actions or inactions.  Nobody gets a free ride, as we are all here to evolve.

Clearly, every child is different, requiring unique approaches.  Also, every child needs parental attention, love, care, and understanding.  When parents refuse to deal with their kids, hoping that somehow, magically, their kids will “do the right thing,” and that no one should ever tell them (the parents) anything negative about their children, these very parents are living in a fantasy.

Moms, Dads, ask people who see your kids in settings where you are absent — as in school, other people’s homes, the playground, sports, after-school programs — how your children behave, and how these other people perceive your children.  Regularly, speak with your child about how life is going for them.  Refuse to accept a grunt as an answer.

Hitting, beating, smacking, any corporeal punishment teaches that might makes right, that physical violence is acceptable under certain circumstances, that bullying has a place.  Being hit is demeaning.  Yes, some kids may stop their inappropriate behavior, yet what has that child learned?  Has that child learned why their behavior had been objectionable?  Has the child learned how to self regulate?  Does the child maintain self respect?

Being hit harms a child’s sense of self, has the child think less of her or him self.  When a parent, supposedly a person who loves a child, then physically hurts that child, the child can get an internally twisted idea of live, even if the child has the intellectual and emotional capacity to distinguish punishment from loving actions.

Start early, when your child is a toddler.  TALK to your child.  Explain why certain behavior is acceptable, while other actions are unacceptable.  Have the child think about this.  Perhaps, the child can draw a picture, act out a scenario, or see something on a good video or child TV show that will demonstrate the lesson you are in the midst of teaching.  Time out is also good.  Taking away or awarding privileges are effective techniques.

As a parent, be sure what you require of your child is age appropriate.  A foolish parent will expect a child in a high chair to eat with the manners of a cultured adult.  This child will sometimes play with her or his food.  This is okay.  Yes, I know, some parents require strict obedience and adherence to adult etiquette, even, for example, the parent, speaking in a very stern harsh tone to the child, then turning the child and high chair to the wall, rather than facing and participating with the family.    This kind of behavior, for example, needs to be avoided, as the child can get nervous about ever pleasing this parent.

Balanced Discipline 2 – Is There Such a Thing? will give 7 ideas you can implement in your home with children of various ages.

What are your thoughts?  What are your experiences?

May you have a blessed day with yourself, your children, your mate, your world!!!!




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A Good Mom Knows When to Get Support

   A good mother knows when to ask for support.  This is before any crisis occurs.  Everyone has to know when she (or he) has taken on more than she can handle.  We all get signals within us, whether a feeling of dizziness, a stomachache, lack of sleep, overscheduled days, the Inner Guidance (different from the chattering internal dialog) or what-have-you.

   Good moms want the best for their children.  In the case of the Newtown, CT, tragedy, there were signals throughout this young man’s life that he needed more help than his mother could give.

    Was it appropriate that the young man’s brother was “supposed to” be his brother’s caretaker?  Only up to a point.  All persons have to have the opportunity and possibility of living their lives, especially as a youngster.  All siblings are meant to help one another, definitely.  This is different from one sibling being responsible for another one, especially if the one needing help has a mental, physical, emotional or spiritual dysfunction.  Dysfunctionality requires expert open-hearted competent help.

    When individuals or a group are always silent, refusing to express their feelings, needs, opinions, desires or anything germane to who they are, this is generally a signal that something is askew.  Often, this lack of response signals that energy is building up, as in a pressure cooker. Without a proper means of release, this energy can — and often may — explode.

     Just as overly angry, aggressive, resentful, dominating, manipulative people have to learn how to better manage their emotions and deal with the underpinnings of what is truly going on within them, so, too, do people who hide everything inside without sharing anything anywhere with anyone.

     It is tragic that this young man, likely with his mom’s best intentions, did not get the help he needed.

     To have him living in a household rife with guns, plus bringing him to a shooting range, was incredibly foolish.   Perhaps target shooting was his mom’s way to release her own stress.  Perhaps she thought target shooting gave her some control over a tenuous challenging home situation. If these were some of her motivations, she was also acting out, rather than doing her internal work.

    Both people needed help.

    Neither got what they needed.

    This is something for all of us to look at within ourselves, our families, our lives. 

    Be sure you get the support you need.  Ask.  Ask.  Ask.  Find people who are competent to help you.  Be willing to give back.  Create a barter.  Find what you can give or share that will benefit the other person or someone else.  Life is an exchange of energy.

    Also, Rather than taking on everything possible, instead take on a moderate amount of “stuff” to do in your life.  Do what you have to do as well and completely as you can.

    The energy of the times is that of flux, transformation, evolution, where each and every one of us is called up to be responsible for our own lives, while also being supportive of one another’s growth.

    Be wise in your choices. 

    Much love in the New Year!!!!



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“Rape Is Rape” Plus Five Tips to Heal From Rape

    First, all rape is reprehensible.  No rape is welcomed or wanted; this is why it’s called rape.  Whether a person is beaten up, under duress with knife, gun or fists, being forced to have any kind of seeming sex act is rape.  And, yes, surprise, a woman CAN get pregnant from this heinous act.

     Despite what Rep Todd Aiken (R-MO) and his followers might say, a woman’s body does not vet a sperm to see if the woman desired that sperm or chose to reject it.  If that were the case, there would be no pregnancies from rape.  As we know, instead, there are many. 

       Pleases be aware that many politicians are lying through their teeth and doing whatever else they feel they have to in order to obfuscate their true intentions and the issues in order to con people — you!!! — into voting for them.  There is a kind of dis-ease of the mind in some people of the Republican Party, yes, including the Tea Baggers, in their so self-righteous approach to life.  It also seems to me that irrespective of religion, all uber-Conservative religionists feel they are always right, and everyone else is clearly wrong, and that the world has to follow their narrow definition of anything.  To refrain from doing so, to them, warrants severe punishment and penalties, both from our beloved Creator and, of course, them. 

     Watch out for this!!!!  These are young souls!  Enlightened souls and beings behave very differently, giving people love and the possibility of evolution.

     Moms, women, girls, awful as it is, we have to acknowledge that there are too many people with political and social agendas calculated to bring women back over 100 years.  A quick word on abortion before I give Five Tips to Heal From Rape.   Before abortion was legalized in the U.S., women still aborted.  Rather than doing it safely, women went into the proverbial back alley and/or stuck hangers into their vaginas.  Is there any sane person who wants this for themselves, her sisters, friends, relatives, any woman?  Clearly, no.  This would be tantamount to the illegal acid-throwing that had been rampant in Pakistan.


1.  Acknowlege that you were raped.  Acknowledge this to yourself, your beloveds, your friends, your spiritual counselor, your therapist.

2.  Get support, counseling and help.  See an energy healer, talk and scream it out.  Pray and ask for spiritual support.  Do The Recapitulation, Tapping, other self-healing techniques.  (See and
 Join a support group and get professional help.

3.  Love Yourself Thoroughly.  After a woman (or man or child) has been raped, often that person wants to hide.  Yes, take a relative moment for yourself, and reach out.  Be sure throughout all this, love yourself completely.  Feelings of being dirty, unclean, violated, less-than, foolish, blame, shame, guilt, and other less-than-loving emotions are likely to cascade through the surviver-thriver.  Experience them for a moment, so you know what it is, then instantly release them.  Let them go to Light.  Whoosh!!!!!!!!  Fill yourself from Crown to Root with Golden White Sparkling Energy and let this bless and clean you thoroughtly. 

4.  Talk About Your Experience.  Share what happened.  Get it out of your system.  Write about it.  Empty yourself of it.  In writing about it, much wisdom will come to you.  Help others who were in similar situations.  If you choose, become an activist.  Take internal and external actions.  Activate your Survival-Thrival Gene.  Know how strong you are.  Yes, take actions to apprehending the perpetrator.  Be pro-active in your ongoing journey to deeper wholeness, which can be construed as holiness.

5.  Give Thanks for Your Wellness.  An attitude of gratitude that you survived, thrived, and are here to continue your life is extremely helpful.  At whatever step in this journey you find yourself, give thanks that you are here.  You live!!! Send love and gratitude to the Creator, to all parts of your body, including your physical self, as well as your emotional, mental and spiritual selves.  Appreciate a blade of grass, the rising sun, the crescent moon, everything.  Ask your inner being what you learned from this experience.  Release fear, and anything less than internal love, as you strengthen yourself in a balanced centered manner.  You will discover that you have learned much about yourself and the world.  Put this to good use.

      Ladies, yes, I was raped many years ago with a knife to my throat, and I have also in the past sometimes been in a sexual situation that I preferred to be out of.  Thankfully, I learned from all of it. 

      Rape is rape!!!!!!!!!!!  No one should have to endure it.  We have to have abortion, whether anyone personally likes it or not.  As half of American pregnancies are unintended, many of them aborted, clearly we have much work to do to have all of us maintain our rights and be responsible with our actions.

     Refrain from ever allowing to take any of this away from you. 

     Love Yourself!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Mama Heart

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Also, WeTheWorld, eWomanPower, more

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"Biblical Marriage Not Defined Simply As One Man, One Woman: Iowa Religious Scholars' Op-Ed via @huffpostgay Good read"